Thursday, March 16, 2006
Creating an interesting life is possible no matter where you are
I left the following comment on Salon in response to another commenter bewailing the mind-numbingness of life in a boring town:
I have spent most of my 31 years on earth in small Southern towns. As a fairly interesting and brainy (IMHO) person, I had to create my own stimulating life. Here are the methods with which I have found success:
1) Help others, especially those deemed unworthy by the social norms: those with addiction, those living with poverty, those with no or unstable housing, the differently abled. People who are willing to work with those society does not see tend to be more interesting than most.
2) Teach or Take classes. Most interesting people in smaller or more rural towns continue to stimulate their intellect by teaching or taking classes. I have made some lifelong friends among professors and other students. Plus you get to talk about intellectual stuff, if you take the right classes.
3) Be a joiner. Join arts organizations, literary magazines, meetups, political groups, nature clubs, outdoor expedition groups, liberal churches (UU in particular) or at least attend their events. You will find the other interesting folks there. I promise.
4) Make your own organization and post announcements in the paper and on the community calendar. Literary club. Liberal religious thought club. Political Party chapter. Sierra Club chapter. The possibilities are endless.
5) Network with those with your interests outside your area. Go to conferences. Meet people on the internet and then have lunch when they are passing through your area. They may know someone interesting who lives in or is moving to your town.
6) Create a collection of the interesting people that you meet at these places and start inviting them to do things with you. Have dinner or coffee with them often. Introduce them to eachother at dinner parties. Go exercise together. Meet their friends. Soon you will have a whole mess of interesting folks and won't have time to be bored.
6) And most importantly...get over your prejudices. Bible College and believing dogs go to heaven are not mutually exclusive with an enjoyment of literature or the arts. That attitude will get you nowhere in creating an interesting life. You must be open to interesting people wherever you find them, even if they are seemingly very different from yourself. You are going to be astounded with the hunter who completely agrees with you on gun control and environmental protection. You will find yourself amazed by the country girl who is a pagan and creates her own altars in nature and also creates amazing photographs of nature which are exhibited in regional art shows. You are in for a big surprise at the Bible College graduate who has a tattoo you can't see and believes that heaven does not exist and that everyone should read Flaubert.
As my mama always said, "Only boring people are bored." We are now in a big city and the same skills have created a social network for us in less than six months that is so extensive that we have to turn down many invitations. You can cultivate this life for yourself. Please give it a shot.
PS Tell me your town and I will make you a list of how to develop an interesting network of folks, or at least how to get the ball rolling. 99% of the research for this type of endeavor can now be done on the internet.
I have spent most of my 31 years on earth in small Southern towns. As a fairly interesting and brainy (IMHO) person, I had to create my own stimulating life. Here are the methods with which I have found success:
1) Help others, especially those deemed unworthy by the social norms: those with addiction, those living with poverty, those with no or unstable housing, the differently abled. People who are willing to work with those society does not see tend to be more interesting than most.
2) Teach or Take classes. Most interesting people in smaller or more rural towns continue to stimulate their intellect by teaching or taking classes. I have made some lifelong friends among professors and other students. Plus you get to talk about intellectual stuff, if you take the right classes.
3) Be a joiner. Join arts organizations, literary magazines, meetups, political groups, nature clubs, outdoor expedition groups, liberal churches (UU in particular) or at least attend their events. You will find the other interesting folks there. I promise.
4) Make your own organization and post announcements in the paper and on the community calendar. Literary club. Liberal religious thought club. Political Party chapter. Sierra Club chapter. The possibilities are endless.
5) Network with those with your interests outside your area. Go to conferences. Meet people on the internet and then have lunch when they are passing through your area. They may know someone interesting who lives in or is moving to your town.
6) Create a collection of the interesting people that you meet at these places and start inviting them to do things with you. Have dinner or coffee with them often. Introduce them to eachother at dinner parties. Go exercise together. Meet their friends. Soon you will have a whole mess of interesting folks and won't have time to be bored.
6) And most importantly...get over your prejudices. Bible College and believing dogs go to heaven are not mutually exclusive with an enjoyment of literature or the arts. That attitude will get you nowhere in creating an interesting life. You must be open to interesting people wherever you find them, even if they are seemingly very different from yourself. You are going to be astounded with the hunter who completely agrees with you on gun control and environmental protection. You will find yourself amazed by the country girl who is a pagan and creates her own altars in nature and also creates amazing photographs of nature which are exhibited in regional art shows. You are in for a big surprise at the Bible College graduate who has a tattoo you can't see and believes that heaven does not exist and that everyone should read Flaubert.
As my mama always said, "Only boring people are bored." We are now in a big city and the same skills have created a social network for us in less than six months that is so extensive that we have to turn down many invitations. You can cultivate this life for yourself. Please give it a shot.
PS Tell me your town and I will make you a list of how to develop an interesting network of folks, or at least how to get the ball rolling. 99% of the research for this type of endeavor can now be done on the internet.
